A pokey-slow driver meandering in the fast lane unwittingly saved the life of Emmy-nominated actor Clift Barwell, who recently starred in the Children Who Need Help Golden Dome Orphanage. As he stormed out of his sports utility vehicle to confront the slowpoke, he heard an audible click and his vehicle exploded in a ball of flames.
"It was either a faulty ignition switch or a bomb," deadpanned Sgt. Michael Krulsky of the Mulch Park Police Department. "We will know full details after our logistics team performs a complete investigation."
Barwell rushed into a nearby church. "It seems that he suddenly got religion," said the head pastor, Reverend Jessie Fernpod of the Mulch Park Church of the Real Jesus.