Saturday, April 28, 2007

President Refers to Reginald Gamma Without Saying his Name

Miami Dade Community College
In a speech in the drizzling rain at Miami Dade Community College, with protesters drinking lattes in a distant perimeter, President Bush received applause from a contingent of Cuban exiles when he took a jab at Doctor Reginald Gamma, Fidel Castro's doctor. Said Bush, "Someone who helps a dictator and has a name like a monster from a Japanese monster movie I mean from the 1960's has got to recognize that we are recognizing that that is just not the way it is done. And it is not the way to be on the side of freedom!"

Bluegreen plant must add that Dr. Gamma was captured by Cuban forces while trying to rescue his mother from Guantanamo Bay Detention Facility and now may be working against his will.

Monday, April 23, 2007

Commuters Disappointed

The Percy and Plankton Morning Show has been cancelled by the company which owns the station because of "a listener complaint." Commuters in Tacoma and other syndication areas are said to be confused by the change.

Dr. Reginald Gamma Works Another Miracle!

Dr. Reginald Gamma has appeared on TV in Cuba, speaking flawlessly in Spanish about the constantly improving condition of his number one patient, Fidel Castro. He stated to a Cuban Government interviewer, "Fidel is so strong now that he can pick up a rock. His improvement is noteworthy. Also, I might add, that I condemn the way they are blowing up hospitals in the US in order to hide the tracks of rabbits that escaped into the floor holes. Hospitals are for curing infirmities! They are not money making sideshows!"

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Shockjockey acuses Towelamp of Murder!

A radio shockjock has accused Billionaire William Towelamp of murder for ordering the demolition of Metropolitan Hospital while some patients were still inside. Percy Temptation, the immensely syndicated disc jockey (who doesn't play records/he only talks) of the Percy and Plankton Morning Show of Tacoma Washington urged listeners to write e-mails insisting that the DA (district Attorney) press charges against Towelamp for burying sick people under "tons of rubble."

The District Attorney, when questioned about the e-mail campaign, stated that "I have not recieved a single e-mail. And Mister Towelamp seems to have procured all the required permits."

A chill wind is blowing in Toronto.