Sunday, September 16, 2018

Speigleman's Security Forces Pass the Buck

The fans of Country Judge--The Movie are not being offered any mea culpas from security forces in the wake of the explosive fiasco at the Speigleman mansion last week. On the contrary, the smoke has not cleared and security is already insisting it was not their fault. A particularly intimidating group, all of whom had either worked as extras or performed bit parts in the Mad Max movie franchise, was unable to prevent the horrific carnage and destruction at the mansion, which now smolders like a low-budget post-nuclear movie set.

A tall and muscular actor and former MMA fighter, identified only as Orta, insists that the blame for the destruction goes directly on the graphologist who was hired to interpret the handwriting of the spray-painted blood-red graffiti on the wall outside of Steven Speigleman's mansion. "All I can say is that he had plenty of time to identify the threatener," said Orta. "He's sitting on his hands. Everyone knows it is Plimberton and all he had to do was identify Plimberton as the threatener and we would have gone after him like a bat out of Hell and took him out." He seemed a little antsy in his leather muscle shirt and chain mail crotch protector. "Our hands were tied. We could not do nothing on our own because we were under contract and awaiting orders from our associate producer who maybe was blown to pieces for all we know--orders which we never got because of a slow-ass graphologist."

"What went through your head when the first mortar hit?" asked the Bluegreenplant reporter.

"I'll tell you what I was thinking," Orta responded while thumping his chest. "I was thinking that I want to tear Billy Plimberton apart in a cage-match. Hell, I don't give a damn if he saved that jury member on TV. I know for a fact that he hates Clift Barwell. I am 120% sure that it's him."


Anonymous said...

There wouldn't be this problem if people paid their fair share of taxes. Because these millionaires and billionaires are too cheap to part with a tiny bit of their money, they vote for politicians who promise to cut their taxes. When revenue goes down, the funding for law-enforcement is cut and that's why they have to hire their own private graphologist to investigate the threats.

Of course the graphologist is slow. They are paying him by the hour!

Anton Lurline
West Hills, California

Anonymous said...

Actually, threatener is not a word.

Hazel Mc Tinbee
Ridgewood Retirement Home
Chattanooga, Tennessee

Anonymous said...

I have been following Billy Plimberton since he was a child-actor and I am sure that he is not a killer. He saves lives; he does not take lives. He is a good kid. And I definitely have reservations about leaving our law enforcement duties to a bunch of rejects from a Mad Max movie!

Sheila Folsom
Hello Kitty City, Nevada