Sunday, November 04, 2007

William Towelamp now Sir William Towelamp


In recognition for his generosity to the people of the earth, William Towelamp has been knighted by the queen of England. Sir William Towelamp is an entrepreneur who made millions and recently bought up all the dangerous mulch and disposed of it in order to protect the public from its insidiously harmful magnetic forces.

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

I didn't write this article, but I have to add that I have met Towelamp and he is a great guy.

Bill Dafferty

Anonymous said...

I am going to email the queen of England to find out if this story is true.

-X. Goldsmith

bluegreenplant said...

Mr. Goldsmith, Our stories are checked and double verified before they go "to press." Rest assured that it is true.

Your name is similar to one of our other readers, a Mister X. Goldstein. Small world.

Anonymous said...

Xavier Goldstein. He's my brother.

I'm still gonna email the queen.

-X. Goldsmith

Anonymous said...

Haha. Nice try. The queen of England isn't even ALIVE!! You tried to trick us. She wasn't even alive in our lifetime (1533-1603). Maybe in some Twilight Zone world, Towelamp was knighted.

-X. Goldsmith

Anonymous said...

Copy and paste this where the sun don't shine!

http://au.answers.yahoo.com/answers2/frontend.php/question?qid=20070927164939AAKbAYe

I saw her with my own eyes. And I smelled her too. She smells like purslane.

Sir William Towelamp

Anonymous said...

http://au.answers.yahoo.com/answers2/frontend.php
/question?qid=20070927164939AAKbAYe

try again!

S. W. T.

bluegreenplant said...

You seem to be citing the data from another, previous Queen of England. Every time one dies, another one steps up to the plate, kind of like rows of sharks' teeth.

Anonymous said...

You smelled the queen? Is that what people do there?

-Chandler Toolon

Anonymous said...

My apologies for my brother, Xavier Goldsmith. He is back on his medication and is now happily staring at the fish tank and singing "We Will Rock You" under his breath.

-Xavier Goldstein

Anonymous said...

Whatever. I am bored with this blog. Post something new, please.

-Steve, the poet